This post is about awareness, self awareness. The last 48 hours have been trying but with my devotion to faith and the love I have for myself, my family, my God and my husband I know that this is "a bump." The last days are a testiment to the fact the Enemy is always waiting, lurking and hoping for any weakness to attack. The Enemy stikes fast and hard and the worst thing about is the victim is paralyzed by his venom, has lost grips with reality and believes only what the Enemy allows him to hear. It is a trap and it is hell, believe me I have been deep in the middle of it, now on both ends.
Moving forward: the does victim is not lost, there is one Hope, God and his faith and the people that love him (whether he thinks so or not) . The good becomes evil and the evil becomes good, this is paralyzing and causes the victim to act out of chracter and rationalize uncharacteristic thoughts and actions. It is not an excuse for ungodly actions, it is why ungodly actions happen. With this said, I am a stronger person and much more self aware because of my experiences as the victim and now as watching someone I love so much become trapped. With the love of God, The Enemy's latest victim was able to see God's truth, take his hand and begin to fight. Fight for his own mind, body and soul. Fight for his life.
We are winning the fight, I know we are. God works in mysterious ways and always with a purpose, God has given me a golden ticket so that I can finally show myself and others that I am committed and strong. God has also given me an infinite amount of artillery against the Enemy. This artillery is simple, I now know how the Enemy plays his game, I can see it, my vision is now clear, the blinders are off and I now have the tools to live a life of purpose, love, patience and Strength- God's strength. I have yet but a drop of HIS strength within me, but it is unlike any experience, I am a strong person and wife, I will honor my husband and love him
unconditionally, I am fighting for both of us while he is healing from the Enemy's strike. I devout my life to this fight, the fight for our marriage and our family. I will fight with the strength of 100 men and I will never surrender my fight against the Enemy's attack, no matter the playing field, the Enemy will not win, I am strong with the Lord and have the tools to finally see the holes of weakness/vulnerability and to repair those and make our wall strong at every point, making our marriage undesirable to the Enemy's plans.
I pledge my life to our marriage, our relationship and our families. I have new understanding of love, honor, respect, appreciation AND patience. At this point we must surround ourselves with postive influences that share in our fight, with those that pray for our love and our happiness as "one" I no longer see us a husband and a wife, we are one, as the Lord says, we become ONE. This is a celebration, knowing we are two people and only two people in this fight, I know we will become alive in our marriage. Our marriage has longed for the foundation that we have finally begun to build, every thing happens for a purpose - this is God's purpose- he has given us this test with the Enemy, a lesson to be learned, that everyday we must be aware, we must show love, we must show strength and we must show devotion to each other and the Lord. I believe God has given us this test or bump to show us that our marriage will reach a new level and be stronger than we ever could have imagined. We will be one, alive and aware and with God's strength and love as never before.
I am praying for us; with you. I am fighting with the strength of God and I will never give up.
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